Happy people choose to be so, according to happiness researchers Foster and Hicks, through a series of specific choices they make about how they will respond to life.   One of the choices they make is to be open to change, to give themselves options.

It turns out that giving yourself options is a very wise choice.  It’s easy to get attached to an idea about what will bring us greater happiness.  But research by Harvard Psychologist Daniel Gilbert has shown that we’re very poor predictors of what will make us happy.

We imagine scenarios where a different job, a different mate, living in a different locale, or having a lot more money would make us happy.  So we choose one of our scenarios, make it our driving goal, and then learn that it isn’t doing the trick.  What then?

If we’re unable to make good predictions about what will being us greater happiness, how can we go about directing our lives?

Opting for Adventure

Foster and Hicks discovered that the happiest among us tend not to have a sole outcome in mind.  They keep their prospects open.

“Happy people,” they tell us, “thrive in an ever-changing world by opening up their lives to a daily bounty of possibilities.”  Rather than holding rigidly to their plans, they approach each day with flexibility, open to seeing new options as the day unfolds.

Their only expectation as they begin a day is that it will hold new opportunities for adventure and discovery.  They let themselves remain flexible and open rather than rigidly clinging to predetermined goals.

That doesn’t mean you have to live without planning and structure to be happy.  It means being willing to alter your  plans or to create new ones if a new discovery or possibility presents itself.   Happy people embrace the “what if” scenarios that present themselves instead of dismissing them out of rigid adherence to a previous plan.

When setbacks and disappointments strike, they look for hidden opportunities.  They ask themselves how they can look at the situation in a different light and search for the options that might be available, aware that life is full of endless possibilities.

They don’t worry about what’s realistic or certain of success.  They follow their hunches and step out in a new direction.

Flexibility: The Risks and Rewards

Sometimes the options that come along are as scary as they are inviting: Giving up a settled career to pursue something that you love, leaving an unhappy relationship to gain the freedom to carve out a new life, moving to an unfamiliar city to take a new job.  The familiar gives us a sense of security, however unsatisfying it may be. Choosing another option threatens that security.

But security is an illusion.  None of us knows what the future may bring.  And to tie yourself to an unfulfilling or even miserable situation deadens your spirit and sucks all the joy from your life.

Taking risks allows you to find new ways to use your strengths, to grow into a broader, more well-rounded person.  It allows you to discover and develop more of your capabilities.   It adds a dimension of exhilaration to your life and makes you feel more connected and alive.

More than that, it leads you to an appreciation for life’s magic, as one option after another enriches your range of experience and reveals to you more and more of who you truly are.